Wednesday, June 27, 2007 

The Internet Is A Funny Thing

I get a big giggle out of how people find my website. Search keywords have included "34DDD" (YEah, and *those* people were sorely disappointed), "urbane shoes" and "kindergarten killer Cho". That one disturbs me a little, and Person, if you ever come by again, I hope you were doing research for a paper. Otherwise, I think you might want to seek help.

So anyway, I could have predicted the 34DDD would get a lot of hits, but I never would have predicted the one post that gets the most hits is this one. "Hep, hep" has gotten my website more hits than any other. Go fig. Strangely enough, the majority of the hits have been from Europe. I wonder if Weezer just released "Island In The Sun" over there?

So if one is trying to drive traffic to a blog via keywords, how do you do it? Sure, you could go blue and post things like "viagra", "penis", or "hot sex for one dollar". But then you just never know what kind of element you are attracting. I suppose I could start writing about Paris Hilton, she's probably a hot search word, but again, I'd be disappointing those people.

Eh, I guess I'll stick with the way things are run. I couldn't keep up with crazy web traffic anyway.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007 

In Late Breaking News....

Turns out there really was a Celtic pagan celebration known as Bomis. Here's more:

There is an ancient pagan/celtic irish holiday called Bómis, which was a tribute to the supreme god in the Irish pantheon, The Dagda. It was celebrated on the last full moon before the summer solstice. They would sacrifice a convicted criminal (preferably a murderer, but oath-breakers would do, in a pinch) by boiling him in a huge cauldron after first incapacitating him with large quantities of mead; the sacrificial victim was guaranteed a clean slate in the afterlife, so he usually didn't protest much. The flesh of the victim was fed to pigs (usually associated with The Dagda), and his rendered fat was made into a candle which was lit each day leading up to the summer solstice. On the summer solstice, the pigs that ate the sacrificial victim were ritually slaughtered, and the town would have a feast.

All donations for LMD's therapy bills will be accepted.


Happy Bomis!

A very Happy Bomis to you and yours. The Chaos family celebrated with Bomis pancakes (chocolate chip and Cool Whip) this morning. Later we will have a cookout and cake.

How will you celebrate Bomis today?

Wednesday, June 20, 2007 

In The Still of Mid-Afternoon

Right now in the Chaos house, no creature is stirring, not even.....anyway.

This is a rare occasion, one which I am not oft met. Cman and LMD rarely take naps anymore, and the Youngling has been fighting his like hell.

Take this afternoon, for example. Cman and I were down in the basement listening to Youngling on the monitor. Youngling often runs through his repertoire of verbiage before falling asleep. We often hear him yelling "COW!" as loud as he can, then hear him giggling at his mighty lung capacity. Today was a tad different, because we instead heard him yelling "OW!" I thought little of it, as this is a new word, and one worthy of exploring. There are many subtle inflective differences a person can use with a word such as that. Besides, it wasn't accompanied by loud thuds, cries of pain or silence, so I let it go.

Shortly after I heard him muttering "car". Again, not earth shattering, he has a few cars and trucks he plays with in his crib. Youngling had a brief discourse on the pros and cons of all things transport, then became silent. Cman and I had a chuckle over how active and chatty he was during nap time today.

Suddenly, I heard the unmistakable crinkling of cellophane. It began quietly at first, almost surreptitously, much like a child trying to sneak a bit of candy. It gradually built until finally it became a deafening crescendo of crumpling and gleeful crowing from the baby.

At that point it hit me. Cars, trucks and trains are all approved nap time toys, but never once has Youngling slept with paper. Curious, I went upstairs to investigate.

I opened the door to find Youngling sitting in the midst of his floor, surrounded by a jumble of toys, shoes and baby wipes. The little stinker resourceful child managed to climb out of his crib then pull a box of wipes off his dresser. Thus the mysterious crinkling sound.

He is now asleep in his room. I can only assume he is in his crib, though based on the omnious, albeit brief, sound of a bell I heard shortly before the silence, I wonder.

Which leads me to ask....what do I do with a drunken sailor adventurous tyke who refuses to remain put? You would think I would have had experience with this by baby three, but the other two miraculously never attempted to break out.

Monday, June 18, 2007 

Ducks and Robes and Things That Moo

Mr. Chaos and I just celebrated seven years of wedded something. Bliss at times, yes. Other times maybe a deep seated resentment tinged with just a hint of tolerance. Most of the time we are quite happy and busy getting caught up in the coaster of life.

This last weekend we escaped from the kids for two whole days (thanks Mom and Dad) and went to stay at the B&B we stayed at during our honeymoon. Most of the weekend was spent shopping, sleeping and eating what we wanted. Really. But there are a few special memories that I will never forget from this past weekend.

The first was on Friday night. As Mr. Chaos will be the first to tell you, he's not a big gift-giving kind of guy. He gives them, and I like them, but it's usually something I told him I wanted, or sent him an e-mail link to buy, or left a cut catalog page laying around sort of thing.

This year he did something so very special I will never, ever forget it.

The weekend after he proposed to me lo those many years ago, he "kidnapped" me for a getaway. That is to say he packed my bags for me, cleared a few days off with my boss and took me here. I ended up falling asleep on him around 6pm, killing any romantic ideas he had for that evening. I woke up the next morning telling him I had the best night's sleep I'd had in years. He hid his disappointment well, and was truly happy I'd managed a decent night's sleep, something I don't do often.

Throughout the years I've wondered what cosmic forces lined up to cause such an excellent sleep. Was it knowing I was with a man I truly loved and admired? Was it that I was secure in the knowledge that he loved me as deeply in return? Was it the sea air? The sound of the waves? Or was it simply this?

Yes, it's true. Over the years I became convinced that this robe was the reason for that sweet slumber. It was the plushest, thickest, softest thing I ever wore, and I coveted one. Frequently.

So you can imagine my reaction Friday night when I opened my gift. Mr. Chaos says first he saw the joy on my face when I realized he remembered I needed a new robe. Then my face crumpled when I saw that famous logo. I bawled. After seven years the man who I have crawled through fire with still cared enough to remember that night 8 years ago. It was a night he'd probably rather forget, wrought with frustration and disappointment, yet he chose to remember it the way it was for me.

In a strange way that gesture touched me more than many other large and small gestures he has made. It sort of summed up the last seven years in a neat little package of 100% Egyptian cotton. All the mundane daily details of the last seven years haven't diminished his love. Suddenly I understood what he had been trying to tell me throughout our married life. That my stretch marks don't matter, the weight gains or losses don't matter, even the fact that I occasionally curse his existence doesn't matter.

What matters is our love. Deep underneath the day to day, it remains. The quality has waxed and waned throughout the years (and I'm still not sure which the moon was on Saturday, sorry hon) but it's there, along with our commitment to one another.

As for the other moments....I think I'll keep them to myself. Not because they are embarrassing or corrupt, but because they are ours and ours alone.

Tuesday, June 05, 2007 

In keeping with my promise...

I've created a new blog to track my fitness progress. Any of you that are interested can find it here.

Monday, June 04, 2007 

But, but...I Have Good Reason....

The last two weeks were the weeks from hell. I made 4 trips to ER, two of which were while Mr. Chaos was in Seattle.

First trip was for me. I'm over it, you're over it, and let's move on, shall we?

Second trip was last Monday. LMD tripped and fell leaving Cman's baseball game. She face planted on a mighty sharp rock, and she cupped her little hand to catch the blood. As soon as she saw the blood she stopped crying and began asking questions such as, "Why is there a lot of bleed?" She required 4 stitches, didn't cry (not even when they injected the novocaine into her cut) and asked the doctors questions about how they stitch it up as she watched. The ER docs were amazed at how brave she was. I bet she is one of those women that does like 10 days of labor without pain meds and then pops out a 12 pound baby someday. You can just see it, can't you? Or maybe a surgeon. Or maybe she'll perform open heart surgery while in labor popping out that 12 pounder. She's that tough. Holla.

Saturday we were back at ER getting said stitches out around 1pm.

Saturday night around 8 PM I was back with the Cman, and they actually greeted me by name at that point. Erg. Cman spiked a temp of 103, had a severe headache and sore throat. We were sent home with meds and a diagnosis of strep throat. Sunday morning the boy was better, temp gone, eating and playing normally. Monday night the temp was back, so I kept him home from school Tuesday.

By midday Tuesday Cman needed me to carry him to the restroom. He was too weak to walk and began complaining that "something felt wrong" when he breathed. Doc said bring him in right away. Long story short, he was severely dehydrated and an hour away from an overnight stay. The docs actually called Wednesday morning to check on him. He was that ill, evidently, and they seemed perplexed as to what was wrong. The kid had dropped 7 pounds in 5 days. He's fine now and back at school, so we'll call it a virus.

Anyway, that what's up with the Chaos clan. The Youngling has been keeping mom sane by not getting sick, hurt or maimed in any way and just being a good guy.


Wow. Just Wow.

Today was LMD's second to last day of school. This is a bittersweet time of year for me. It's exciting watching her grow up, yet it tugs at my heart just a bit to get a confirmation that she's growing up. I walked her into class today with that sense of sadness.

We walked into the room and her teacher, Mrs. S greeted us with a bigger than usual smile and said, "Thanks for all the help you were in class this year!" She handed me a potted fuschia.

Let's be clear. Yeah, I "helped". I went on field trips so I could participate in my kid's joy. I brought snacks on several occasions, again, for the kid's benefit and joy. I even *gasp* gave funds to the school for special goodies and activities. I was just being a mom who loves a kid. Honest.

I was so touched by that gesture, though. It was absolutely, completely unnecessary, yet it spoke volumes. Those tiny flowers indicated how much this woman cared for my child those few hours every day. Suddenly, the pot in my hand was a symbol of the connection she had forged with my daughter this year.

I hope I don't kill them.