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Thursday, April 19, 2007 

Beware the Ides of April

What is it with this time of year? Columbine. Virginia Tech. Oklahoma City. Branch Davidian standoff. Hitler's Birthday. See a pattern?

I know most of the incidents happening in schools this week are kids desperate for the same level of attention Cho is getting. Realistically I know in my heart this is true. My knee jerk emotional reaction is to pull Cman out of school and homeschool him.

I remember when Columbine occurred. I was a working woman in my late twenties. Mr Chaos and I were newly engaged, and I remember coming home from work that day in utter shock. He and I sat on the couch drinking beer and watching news reports. A tear trickled out of my eye. I hastily wiped it away, but it soon became a torrent. I railed at Mr. Chaos that to bring children into a world such as this was madness. It was the height of vanity. I vowed that we wouldn't have kids with the world that messed up. Bless his heart, he agreed, though I am sure he knew it was a fleeting fancy.

Cman came along in 2000, and while Cman and I were visiting my parents, the unthinkable atrocities of 9/11 occurred. I sat holding my nine month old son, tears pouring down my face again. This time my heart hurt looking at my innocent little boy. It pained me to know that I couldn't protect him and if evil wanted to get him, it would. I was thankful that I didn't have a child old enough to understand how horrific people can be.

Then the incidents of this week occurred, and I had the difficult task of trying to explain yet shield Cman from the events at VT. He knows a man shot people, lots of people. I'm not sure he understands it was at a school. At least he hasn't shown me he's made the correlation. Though now that I think on it, maybe he has since he's been crying and not wanting to go to school the last two days.

I sit here typing now and there at least two incidents in the news. One is in Florida, where a boy said he wanted "an even higher death toll than Virginia Tech". Another is in Tempe, AZ where a suspicious package has been found in a bathroom.

My God, when is it enough? When will this stop? Has our society become so enamored with fame that some will do anything to achieve it? Loner kids want attention, and unfortunately this is a great way to get it. All I know is until we figure it out, it's all I can do not to keep my kids home for the next few weeks.

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