« Home | Hey! We found the WMD! Over here! » | Some days are better than others. » | Pleasures I always forget » | I'll see your penis and raise you two balls » | What were you doing 5 years ago on this night? » | Dude, I'm twitching. Hold me. » | Just push M. » | The One Where the Child Says, "Dammit" » | Since my letter to Santa was obviously diverted...... » | The Diva has spoken. » 

Wednesday, January 25, 2006 

We're making the switch

At the tender age of 5 months, we are switching the youngling over to formula. Once I can let the desire to win the Golden Vagina award go, I'll be ok with this decision. Really.

I guess I feel like I am failing him in a way. My reasons are all purely selfish ones and will make the breastfeeding nazis stage a nurse-in at my house. Well, after they storm inside and take away my membership card, that is. Yes, I am a reformed breastfeeding nazi. Good Lord, I never even knew they existed!

My reasons? Oh, little things. Sleep. Remember that? That stuff when you were single you gave up for really great sex? Now that I am a parent I find sleep infintely more appealing. I treasure it like a fine wine and can even rate my quality of sleep on a scale. Right now if I were to compare it to a wine, I think it would best be compared to Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill. Gets the job done, but not a very satisfying trip, if you get what I'm sayin'.

Another big reason? Weight loss. Yep, I am not one of those moms that has the weight magically melt off while breastfeeding. I am so lucky that my body hoards the fat, just in case! You never know when we might see food again and we MUST FEED THE BABY! Seriously. Been eating healthy, run/walking almost every day and the futzing scale will get to a certain number only to rebound. In my defense, I was a gestational diabetic with this last pregnancy, so it is important for my health to lose the weight. So take that, ya nazis!

Finally and one of the most frivolous reasons of all, and one that will most definitely take me out off the running for the Golden Vagina award........I'm leaving my kids for a week. (Can you just hear the hate mail coming my way?) Yes, me, the Dr. Sears reading, sling wearing, extended nursing, co-sleeping mom is leaving my babies. No, I am not off to cure cancer, have a surgery or write the next great novel (which you probably knew anyway if you read here). I'm going......on a vacation. With my husband. To a great resort. And I am excited about it. Hell, if the only date you had with your husband in three years was a quick 4 hour night out, you would be, too. Especially if said resort is an all-expense paid trip picked up my hubby's company. Nice. It doesn't hurt that my parents will be watching the hellions, er......darling angels. (hi, mom!)

So, confessional over. Baby is getting the swill, the poison, the canned powder so futzing expensive it may as well come with a nanny to give it to the kid. And you know what? I am totally okay with that. I think I'm even ok with the judgement I will probably receive from other moms. Yeah, you.

Although if it turns out I am still in the running once all the votes are tabulated, I might be able to make it to the awards ceremony. Hell, the gals might even be small enough to fit into a sexy little number by then. I can be the black sheep in the group amongst all the soccer moms with their khaki capris and matching sweater sets.

And that suits me just fine.

I can't BELIEVE I am friends with a former breastfeeding nazi. Hmph. Seriously, the little guy will be fine. Breasts are good, formula is good, it's all good. No guilt. Guilt is not good.

Welcome to the club. I was there, and now I am here and to be honest....it ain't so bad. Besides, we can both be in counseling together when our younglings go because they are all whacked out because mom didn't breastfeed them for a LEAST a full yeat. ;-)

No judgement from me...a happy mama makes for a happier family. :-)

Love ya girlie! I have no idea what the conflict feels like. I have been a formula mommy my entire mommy career. I know it runs deep for you though. (((HUGS)))

Awww girlfriend! Don't you start talking like that! Like someone said...a happy momma is a happy family! I feel your pain though. You know I do!

I used to be quite the judgy Lactivist myself ;~) Not a contest, I've discovered.

Take it easy, Lady!

Good luck with weaning!


Post a Comment

Links to this post

Create a Link